H2O

On the recent trip North, my mom commented on the fact that my kids are fascinated with the idea of drinking water that comes from the sink.

"Well, their water either comes from the door of the fridge, or a bottle. They've never had sink water before."

And just to piss off my mom, I didn't tell her why. I'll just let her think that I'm teaching my children to be Conspicuous Consumers, and isn't it just horrible the way kids are today? Not knowing water comes from the sink? Honestly. They probably think horses are pink and blue, and that bunnies cluck! Well.

Here's my reply. Mom. Even though you'll never read this. Mom.

Mother, you should understand this better than anyone, being the daughter of a plumber. Then again, considering how long it took grandpa to plumb his own house (and I won't mention what a crappy job he did), maybe not.

It's a matter of plumbing and geography. Ya see, in Minnesota the water pipes have to be buried down below the frost line...somewhere between 32" and 36". I don't remember the actual number. And chances are, that water has come from deep in the ground...where it's about 40 fahrenheit. Even if the water came from a water tower and a treatment center before that, it came from a well before that. It's probably going to be pretty cool once it travels underground for a while. Add to that, the temperature outside is only really "warm" or "hot" about 100 days a year.

Compare this to Texas. The pipes don't have to be buried below any stinkin' frost line, because there IS no frost line. And the water came from a reservoir (AKA dammed up river), which then went through treatment, which went to the water tower that stands in "hot" weather for, oh, 200 days a year. Even so, the temperature only drops below freezing a few days a year here.

Odds are, the water suffered an algae bloom (from too much sun) or decline in purity due to excessive rain (as in, May through July of this year) and tastes...well, like a rain puddle with an algae bloom in it.

And on top of that, it comes out of the sink warm. Lower than body temperature, but not by much.

So...I can spend a little money on a refrigerator with a chilled water filtration system in it, and also give my kids bottles of water so they don't try to drink out of that filthy fountain on the playground--the one that's covered in bird shit.

I'd never stop my kids from drinking from the garden hose, nor trying to catch raindrops or snow in their mouths, but let's put it this way, Mother:

I wouldn't serve my kids water I that I would prefer not to drink myself. And I don't want to drink the algae puddle that comes out of my kitchen faucet.

Put that in your grandma pipe and stuff it.

PS: My children DO know that real horses are not pink or blue, and they also know that while bunnies do NOT cluck, they sure to scream when you step on them.