We bowled ONCE.

When I tell my Texas friends that I used to hang out at the bowling alley all the time, but only bowled once, most of them are confused. A lot of them think that's weird, but a few "get it."

With explanation, they all get it. "Oh, it had an arcade. NOW I understand."

It makes me want to say, "No, I don't think you do. We never called it the arcade. We never referred to the games as arcade games. It was "The Alley." And they were just VIDEO games. No need to fancy it up with such a title as "arcade." That word was for other places--bigger places where we obviously weren't.

It was a rare occasion for me to even play one of the games. Mostly I watched others play.

In particular, my brother The Boy's best friend, Spec. Forces Ed, was a phenom on Pac-Man. He could play forever, until he got distracted or tired or just bored with playing. He usually had a crowd around him. Then the Powers that Be replaced the Pac-Man machine with Ms. Pac-Man, damn them!

I never thought about that before--obviously, very little money was being made off Pac-Man if Ed was playing it for an hour at a time on $.25, when usually a game like that should bring in several dollars an hour.

Mostly we all stood around, playing games or watching others, leaving to drive around town for a while and then coming back. You know--hanging out. Well, I was mostly tagging along. But as long as I wasn't a pain in the ass and didn't embarrass them, The Boy and Spec. Forces Ed would allow me in their presence.

The Alley was also, of course, a bowling alley and pool hall. We got to go there every fall for gym class, and I would compete with the older girls to get the "best" pair of size 5.5 bowling shoes. (I usually got them, BTW.) Then there were the requisite birthday parties that were held there, and we went a few times when we needed to find someone's mom during Afternoon Leagues.

But only ONCE did we ever go there and just bowl. It was probably a Saturday or Sunday after New Years', so there were no Leagues going on, and the place was dead because the rest of the world was hungover or out drinking somewhere. The Boy, BeerHound, and I along with each of our best friends decided to bowl on a lark. Now granted, all of our friends were excellent bowlers, and it was us that were the charity cases, but it was fun. A lot of fun.

But then, that was The Alley.

*This was written because yesterday, The Alley, whose real name was Cactus Lanes, suffered a serious fire. All of us who spent a large chunk of our youth, and particularly those like Spec. Forces Ed who still spend a large chunk of their adulthood at the place, are concerned and heartbroken over this. We hope it can survive this. The place epitomizes what's missing today in a lot of people's lives: real face-to-face human interaction, physical activity, mindless entertainment, or to quote from the movie Dazed And Confused, "...good ol' worthwhile visceral experience."

So, to Steve, the current owner of the place: I hope you choose to keep on with the provision of visceral experiences. Because a bowling alley ain't just a bowling alley. Thanks.